You’ve received the bad news: you’re too sick to travel. Now what? Do you still go and risk your health or do you sit at home and mope? Both shitty plans tbh. Here are my top ten tips on how to mentally revive yourself whilst you’re feeling your worst whilst dealing with the fact that you’re not going on that trip you told everyone about.
1. Be honest: I know what you’re thinking, just lie about the trip. Say that you went, no one has to know you missed out and conversation finished. After a few weeks there’ll be nothing to talk about= Wrong. There’s nothing more awkward than having to hear someone ‘make up’ a trip they never went on. At the end of the day, it wasn’t your fault and being honest about how bummed out you were by not going also gives you a bit of relief. Shit happens and if we constantly airbrush our shit – how will we ever have honest conversations?
2. Wallow in that self-pity my friend: You are allowed to feel sorry for yourself. I’m going to say that it’s even healthy for you to do so. At the end of the day, I feel there is a lot of stigma around feeling sad when you have a mental health disorder and that you always need to be ‘happy’ or feeling somewhat appreciative of your circumstances no matter how shitty you actually feel. Take this time out to really evaluate what you’re going through. You booked the trip, you wanted to go and now you can’t. Boo Life! (leave the preppy positivity for the people you talk to)
3. Get a Doctor’s note: You most probably will have to pay for it but just having the reassurance that you have evidence to prove your circumstances will make the whole process run so much more smoothly. In my case, I didn’t even need the doctor’s note in the end but it was still a good idea to get it (Thanks Doc!)
4. Start calling and cancelling a.k.a CANCEL EVERYTHANG!: In the midst of feeling horrible and trying to mentally process everything – start getting yourself organised. The sooner you call the booking agents, insurance people etc. the easier it will be. In my case, the website I booked with were amazing. On their website there was a clear message that cancelling with them was a HELL NO but the guy on the phone gave me a full refund (without even having to see my doctor’s note). It was dealt with so quickly and efficiently that I was genuinely shocked.
For the coach tickets I was also able to get a full refund (apart from £7.99 as a cancellation fee for the two tickets) but other than that, I am now able to use those tickets in 2020 to any place at any time.
I wasn’t able to do anything about my insurance unfortunately (ironic) as it was long overdue in terms of the cancelling date (14 days after purchase) and that was around £27 something. In the end, I was happy I at least tried and was able to get majority of my money back.
5. Binge watch everything: All those times you were at work, studying, doing something with your life and you just thought ‘oooooh another thing to add to the watch list, when the hell am I going to find the time to watch all of this?’ Now. Right now. This is the time where you’ll be able to watch any and everything. Remember this will probably never happen again and you should embrace this for what it is (whilst ignoring the obvious fact that you could’ve been abroad right now and exploring …NVM).
6. Everyone else will probably be more upset than you: Remember when I said leave that preppy positivity for the people you talk to…yeah that doesn’t really apply to their firsthand reaction. As I mentioned in my previous post, you somehow get off on the high of telling everyone where you’re going, your holidays plans etc. but no one tells you that feeling can also backfire. The same high will turn into a deep low when your plans don’t really work out. This means that you have to mentally prepare yourself on not only the mini speech you’re going to give but also how you’re going to react. Feeling sorry for yourself is a no but also sounding too happy makes it seem that you kind of didn’t want to go in the first place/you’re lying. There’s a careful line between informing but relying on their reaction. People seem to live through others so you may even find people are more disappointed than you were and that’s also ok (just finish the convo quickly and keep it moving – trust me!)
7. Germs spread…so keep your germs to yourself: Yes, my whole family caught my stomach virus a few days later – it wasn’t pretty. I won’t be the first to admit that when you have something like this you don’t really think it’s that contagious but it really is. In the midst of having severe abdominal pains and (mind my language) vomiting and shitting yourself to oblivion, remember to disinfect every surface you touch such as taps, door handles, hand soaps etc. The occasion will turn pretty shitty pretty quickly (no pun…who am I kidding? Of course it was intended).
8. Relax. I understand this is easier said than done but at the end of the day you are sick and as much as you may want to pull it apart and analyse it – you’re still sick. You couldn’t go on your trip, you’re feeling sad but you can’t feel better about your situation until you actually feel better. Trust me on this!
9. Read: Read a book before you go to bed so you can stay off screens an hour or two and fully switch off from everything. Read something you’ve always wanted to read but haven’t had time for. Take this time to really settle into yourself and just chill. Just don’t read up on the news or the events that are going on in the place you were going to travel to – don’t rub salt in the wound now child.
10. Plan your next trip: Take this time to really (in detail) plan your next trip. You can go all the way to seeing how much it would all cost (flights and all) just to get that excitement back. Think of a time of year that would be great to visit and hopefully with positive vibes you will be able to go again or even better find a new place to discover!
The Anxious Portuguesa 